safe word

noun

plural safe words

1

: a prearranged word or phrase that someone participating in BDSM sexual activity uses to signal that the activity should stop immediately

A safe word allows the person to indicate to their partner that they do not feel safe or comfortable.

—Sophie Foster

A safe word should not be 'no' because, frequently, shouting 'no' is part of the fantasy of resistance.

—Ally Booker

… they frequently engaged in sadomasochistic role-playing that involved announcing a "safe word" if one or the other wanted to stop.

—Matthew Barakat

(figurative) Consider the Snake Oil Noir [cocktail], a particular masterwork that … takes a lot of people to the brink of uttering their safe word. In part, that's because of the Ancho Reyes chile liqueur added for both heat and an earthy aspect.

—Jon Bonné

2

: a prearranged word or phrase known only by a small group of people (such as an extended family) that is used especially to confirm identity or to convey that one feels unsafe

Suggest picking a simple code word that only close family knows. If someone calls claiming to be a grandchild in crisis, the grandparent can calmly ask for the safe word. If the caller cannot answer, hang up.

—Hannah Dreyfus

If a neighbor or family friend is picking the child up and he says the safe word to the kid, then the child would know it's OK to go with them.

—Mike Koury

… while students are on those phone calls [with the Boys & Girls Club of Central Iowa], they can use a safe word to indicate if something is wrong at home.

—Christina Salonikas

Word History

First Known Use

1979, in the meaning defined at sense 1